How To Find Love In A Plastic Society
Far too often people enter a relationship with a huge list of unrealistic expectations. Those could be, “he should be tall and handsome, wealthy, preferably with green eyes, and have nice muscular arms,” or, “she should be beautiful, great body, well educated, love children, have a good job, and be a great cook.” When you set these sorts of parameters around a future relationship, you are already condemning it to fail.
These expectations on what kind of person you are supposed to marry is engraved within must of us at an early stage. Humans have flaws, and in a world where everyone is being photoshopped to fit a certain mold, flaws are not something that this society accepts. If finding a life partner is high upon your list, then you should foremost accept that “perfection” does not exist. Understanding and accepting someone for who they are is love. The media is responsible for creating such enormous expectations. We are bombarded daily with celebrities, who are seemingly living perfect lives, and the constant need to measure our own life to theirs is making us very unhappy. It is an impossible competition and we must realize that what we are fed with is nothing more than an illusion. Only then we will be able to start to live a happy life.
People are naturally drawn to happy and independent individuals. The more you focus on being positive and happy, the more people are going to want to be near you. Being alone and feeling lonely are two entirely different things. Just because you are in a relationship does not automatically make you feel happier or less alone. There is nothing worse then being in a bad and disheartening relationship. If you want to find a positive and happy partner, it’s time to start thinking about things that make you happy.
If you want to find love, you must learn to love yourself first. For some that might simply mean taking the time to get to know yourself. Learn what you like and what you really cannot stand. There is nothing more attractive than someone who is comfortable in their own skin. Listen to your own feelings and allow yourself to be compassionate toward yourself. Take care of your mind, your body, and your space. You will instantly feel more loved when you start treating yourself with respect. Eat healthy food, go out and exercise, and make sure you are getting enough sleep. When you ignore yourself, you are subconsciously giving out a message that you are not worth loving.
Be Worth It
Imagine yourself walking into a jewelry store in search of a present for someone special. You find two pieces each of identical beauty, yet one is priced a little bit higher than the other. The sales lady explains to you that they are both pretty much the same, and that only difference is the price. Most people will decide on the more expensive piece, simply due to the perception that the more expensive one should be of better quality. So regardless of what the sales person has said, most will still decide to pay that extra even for the same piece, simply because someone has set a higher value to it. Raising a lower priced item is a very common sales tactic used to get rid of stock that is not selling.People like to end up with something of value, and the more value you set for yourself, the more people will be attracted to you. If you keep lowering self-worth, you are most likely going to end up in yet another destructive relationship where you end up being taken for granted.
If you do not like something, say it! There is nothing more damaging to a future relationship then not being yourself. For example, if you hate cooking make it known from the beginning, pretending to like something you don’t is simply going to create fake expectations in your relationships. Save yourself a heartbreak and don’t pretend to be someone you’re not. It’s not fair to yourself or your future partner.
Everything in life has a cycle, including love! Trying to speed up or slow down a natural process, due to impatience or fear is only going to ruin all the special “moments,” along the way. Every relationship is different. And although some might blossom overnight others might take months. Nobody likes to be rushed, so take your time and have faith that if something is meant to be, it will be. Falling in love does not have a timeframe, just be patient and enjoy the ride, because after all the best part of love is falling in love.